Bridge the Trust Gap: Reboot Your Stakeholder Plan
Even the most trusted leaders discover blind spots in their stakeholder relationships.
As senior leaders, we sit at the center of an ecosystem of stakeholders. Even those of us known for relationship-building often have one or two partnerships that are not as strong as we would like.
Over my 25+ years in business and HR leadership, I have prided myself on being a “trusted partner.” In my early days as a business unit leader, my manager (a great coach), encouraged me to actively seek feedback on my relationships. The first time I did it, I was both validated and surprised, and not in a good way. A good portion of the input was very positive, but what stood out was the feedback from key partners in my orbit that did not align with the story I was telling myself. This feedback was difficult to hear because I believed I was consistently showing up as a strong collaborator. When I reflected on the coaching I had received and compared notes with trusted peers, I uncovered the pattern. The relationships that suffered were usually the ones I had neglected until I needed something from them. In those moments, I showed up with urgency but without the foundation of an ongoing connection. The result was that my outreach felt transactional, sometimes overwhelming, and left us having to “reboot” trust.
By contrast, the healthiest partnerships were grounded in a steady rhythm of check-ins, mutual give-and-take, and what I call “truth-talk,” conversations where candor and confidentiality were givens.
When clients ask me how to build or repair trust with stakeholders, I share the same simple process I learned early in my career — one I still use today to reboot and refresh relationships that matter most.
The Process
Inventory Your Stakeholders
Start by mapping your ecosystem, including executives, peers, team members, customers, and partners. Include the prominent players and those who influence outcomes behind the scenes.Assess the Relationships
Look at each stakeholder through two lenses: their importance to your success and your significance to theirs. Then make an honest call on the current level of trust: high, medium, or low. This is less about perfection and more about awareness. If you are not sure, that is a strong signal there; there's some work to be done.Create an Engagement Plan
Decide where to invest time and energy. Strong relationships need to be sustained, mid-level ones deserve intentional attention, and weaker ties may require a fresh start. Write down a few specific actions for each group.Execute the Plan and Build Routines.
Build these actions into your weekly and monthly routines. Consistency matters more than intensity. Keep at it: nurture the “highs,” elevate the “mediums,” and repair or reignite the “lows.” Along the way, demonstrate a few simple but powerful behaviors:Be direct: approach conversations with clarity and no hidden agenda.
Be authentic: own it if you have let the relationship slide.
Ask questions: “What can I do to be a better partner to you and your team?”
Listen openly: show a willingness to be influenced by what you hear.
Show appreciation: acknowledge both feedback and partnership contributions.
A Real-World Example
One senior sales leader I coached proudly called himself a “relationship guru.” His CliftonStrengths results and 360-degree feedback from his team supported that claim. He was consistent with his direct reports: he scheduled regular one-on-ones, clarified roles before key meetings, joined ride-alongs with balanced feedback, and maintained a near-obsession with 24-hour follow-up. His people trusted him deeply.
Feedback from peers and internal partners painted a less glowing picture. This feedback stung because he was very intentional about giving recognition to the team in public forums. One marketing partner put it bluntly: “He only reaches out to complain.” Others said he did not respond to requests promptly, delegated too much downstream, and rarely acknowledged their contributions. His intent to thank them in visible ways was not landing. To them, most interactions felt punitive.
Instead of dismissing the feedback, he set up a 30-minute “state of the partnership” meeting and invited candid input from his peer leaders. The feedback hit him hard, but he committed to improving the partnership. He created new touchpoints and asked his delegate to share success stories from the marketing team so that he could respond in real-time. He has since extended this approach, setting up semi-annual touchpoints with his partners in Finance, HR, IT, and CX to maintain alignment and trust across the broader business.
The change was not dramatic or flashy, but it was consistent. It immediately shifted the tone of the relationship. Today, both sides report a more productive and respectful partnership.
Watching him wrestle with this reminded me of my own early lessons: trust is never a one-time achievement; it is an ongoing practice.
The Spark
Trust is built on the small, steady actions that happen long before you need something from your stakeholders. Identify one relationship you have neglected, reach out this week to schedule a “partnership check-in, and commit to staying consistent. Small steps to reboot the relationship can have a big impact on your shared success!
